In anticipation of this post, I've stared at the intimidating text box of the blogger website for more than a few minutes. I found myself paralyzed with the prospect and unspoken challenge to say something meaningful, insightful, important. Blogs, websites, news, and musings are an investment in precious hours that won't ever return and the onus then falls to the author to ensure that those who sacrificed their time and effort to entertain another's thoughts are adequately rewarded.

This, sadly, won't be such a post.

This week, I found myself actively distancing myself from sources of conflict and negativity. One aspect of my character I've long wrestled with is my tendency to shy away from conflict. We all bear certain crosses and mine, if may be so called, was a childhood full of such incessant and destructive arguments; as an adult, I've resolved never to be involved in such fights (a) if I can avoid it and, (b) unless somehow directly relevant to me. Some coworkers, whom I won't name, thrive on dissecting and enumerating the reasons why their jobs are absolutely miserable and how they actively debate finding other means of employment. I, on the other hand, am not so cynical to believe this. Nonetheless, I find myself struggling to balance polite refusal to encourage such oppressive negativity and my own personal needs for optimism in a small staff. It's an ongoing struggle that will, unfortunately, only get worse as the agency moves into the stressful and hectic energy assistance season next week.

Chavonne and I are continuing to refine and clean up our relationship, treating it like a delicate artifact that requires patience, care, and tenderness. We're working on becoming even better friends, sharing common interests (including besting the world-eater Galactus yesterday evening), and exploring new interests (like our long-forgotten quest for the perfect pizza in Pittsburgh). These, of course, are similarly never-ending endeavors and challenges that I can only hope we'll one day be the equal of.

As always, I intend to retain my optimism, my sense of justice, and abiding love for family and friends as sword and shield in the trenches of daily life against the challenges advocacy and the minutiae of daily defeats.

1 Comment

  1. Chavonne on September 25, 2009 at 7:48 PM

    I miss seeing you as often as we used to (which wasn't much to begin with!). I'm so proud of you cleansing yourself of negative energy. AOMT

     


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